"Be careful what you wish for." - The Vampire Diaries Episode (3x15) Recap

OK, kiddos, I'm back in full form this week, and so was The Vampire Diaries. 

Previously on The Vampire Diaries...

• Esther lost her Mother-of-the-Year Award.
• Elena breaks hearts.
• Stefan runs from pain.
• Klaus gave Caroline a pony.
• Dresses get ripped.

"Why do you look like someone just shot a polar bear?"

Everyone seems to still be reeling from the previous night's festivities, traumas, and tears. Elena gives Stefan a call to talk about their porch convo, but he's dodging her. Then, she calls Damon. He answers, and tells her that he was too busy to answer the 10 calls she gave him. Elena looks confused. Damon looks smug. Rebekah looks sleepy.

"If you don't shut your mouth, the next thing out of it will be your teeth."

After some playful ribbing of who'll crack and place a late-night booty call first, Damon and Bex are greeted by confused Elena. With both Salvatores ignoring her, Elena decided to pay them a visit. She's not too happy to see Damon boned Rebekah. Bex is, though. 

What was funny (besides Damon & Bex's bantering) was how Elena figured Damon had been compelled. She really thinks her sh*t don't stink, don't she? Anywho, the boys told her to get over her guilt, and in a show of solidarity told her to let sleeping Originals die. 

Rebekah ends her walk of shame to find herself the butt of her brothers' jokes. She didn't seem to appreciate Kol calling her a strumpet. Loved how Klaus was amused by Bex's annoyance. I for sure thought he'd be the one giving her the most grief.

"It's not working. I can hear every word about Damon, the Vampire Gigolo." 

Bonnie, Caroline, and Elena try to recreate the privacy spell Esther performed at the ball. No avail. The only thing the girls did accomplish is listening to Elena bitch about Damon's wandering...eye. Bonnie revealed that Esther wants to hook-up with her and Abby. Caroline thinks Elena needs to let the Originals die for the greater good. 

"One thing I've learned in my time on this Earth: Be careful what you wish for."

Courtesy of Loveablesinss

Elijah didn't believe Elena when she said Esther only wanted to apologize for trying to kill her. After he finds the burnt sage, he questions Rebekah about her thoughts on their mother's return, but her belief in Esther isn't enough to squelch his doubts. After taking Elena out to the woods, Elijah traps Elena in a cave. Apparently the change in her heart beat revealed her lies. 

"I'm surprised you've had time to call her with all the original sex you've been having."

Once the boys discover that Elena has gone missing (again), they try to track her down. Alaric just figures she is ignoring Damon's calls since she's upset with him having a new "special friend." Besides, Alaric is too busy on a date with Meredith. 

Apparently after all the tests she performed on him, Merry can't find any clues who "killed" Ric. Their date was short-lived, though, because it gets crashed by Klaus and Kol. The boys have decided to hit the town, and Kol wants to hit Merry. *wink wink* 

"Just to be clear, I'm too smart to be seduced by you."

After Elijah strong arms the SalBros to kill the Bennett Witches in exchange for Elena's life, the boys decide to concoct their own plan. Damon sends Caroline in as a distraction for Klaus so they can dagger Kol. They figure it'll be a win-win situation. With the OGs down Elena can escape Bex, and they won't have to kill Bonnie & Abby. It all goes pretty well until Klaus realizes his sibs are in danger. Elijah shows up, fills the boys in on their mom's shenanigans, and the tables turn. 

Still not wanting to kill the witches, Damon and Stef come up with a Plan B. Instead of killing them, the boys flip a coin on who'll be the bad guy. Damon turns Abby, and the spell goes kablooey. Esther disappears, Abby is in transition, and Elena is saved. YAY?

"Where the hell is everyone?"

Courtesy of TVD_Art

After Esther and Finn are gone, the other Originals disperse. Rebekah decides to stay with Klaus since he's the only one that's always been there for him. She informs Klaus that she saw a painting in the caves that show the White Oak tree had returned 300 years after they burnt it to the ground. Their deaths still are possible.

Elena tries to comfort Bonnie, but Caroline turns her away. Even though they love her, everything they've lost has been because of her. Have the PowerPuff Girls broken up?

Stefan asks Damon why he took care of Abby when Stefan was the one who lost the coin toss. Damon reveals that he's noticed Stef is no longer on people blood, and figured the guilt he was already dealing with was enough. Besides, after failing to win Elena from Stefan he figures it's better for everyone if he goes back to being the Bad Brother.

I love how this time around Damon has decided to choose his baby bro over a chick. He knows Elena's heart will always belong to Stefan, and isn't willing to lose the only person who's been by his side for nearly 200 years. Our boy has finally grown up. 

Alaric was injured during Operation Kill Originals, and convalesced at Meredith's. Unfortunately, when he woke up in the middle of the night he found the Mystic Falls Slasher Dagger hidden in her kitchen. Too bad she caught him snooping, and shot him. I guess she was the crazy killer after all. 

Questions, Comments, Wonderings...

• Esther needed a full moon to perform the ritual, and the Bennetts' power. Also, the spell would've made the OGs human so they could be killed. They didn't necessarily have to die die. 
• Why was Bonnie burning candles on her bed?
• Nice season 1 nod to have Damon testing Stefan by leaving a glass of blood after a conversation. 
• Elijah is a sharp dresser. Probably the best dressed man on the show. 
• 9:07 Elena was supposed to die.
• Klaus: "Say another word, and I'll tear out your liver."
• Klaus: "Isn't she stunning?" Kol: "She certainly looks good walking away from you."
• Damn, Klaus is sprung!
• Alaric calling Meredith a slob was bad dating etiquette. 
• Meredith: "Rest. Stefan and Damon are going to take care of Elena. I'm going to take care of you."
• Elena: "Are you insane?" Rebekah: "I prefer spontaneous. Maybe that's why Damon likes me so much."
• Rebekah: "Here's what's going to happen. You're going to come outside, or you're going to stay in there and burn."
• Tweet of the Day: @NaughtiaRules - "Well don't piss off an Original that hasn't had a period in centuries."
• Klaus: "Enough! All this talk is boring me."
• Esther: "If you've come to plead for your life, sorry, you've wasted your time."
• Thank you for acknowledging (finally) that Bonnie always gets the short end of the stick!
• Now Elena has Elijah leaving her love notes. Aww....
• Elijah: "Mother made us vampires, but she didn't make us monsters. We did that to ourselves."

There won't be a new episode of The Vampire Diaries until March 15th. Boo! What did you like most about "All My Children?" Next time we'll discover just how Damon Salvatore became the man we love (to hate) in the 3rd flashback of the season, "1912." A woman from his past schools him on the best ways to use women, turning Damon from the soft-spoken troublemaker he used to be, and into a Vampire Gigolo.